The Old-Queens-Syndrome

So, there's time for a new journal.

My sister (Izabeth) and her gf (ElaryWakefield) visited me and my father in Vienna. They came in July and stayed for two weeks. I haven't seen my sister since almost two years! I missed her so much, my little stinky sister!
They both slept in my old room...well it was my sister's and my old room when we were "cute" children. Every day at 5 a.m. they heard a horribly drunk guy walking by yelling some strano things which they couldn't understand and puked almost every time he walked by. The mysterious thing about him was, that it sounded like he'd be in our garden and we never saw vomit stains on the street. Well, the sound just seemed to come from the garden, because the room is on the second floor and if someone walks by outside it really sounds like someone is in the garden. The disappearing vomit mystery couldn't be solved that fast. Here in Vienna they don't clean up the streets that fast, so we can often see vomit-stains or lost food on the sidewalks for days. I told they sister that they should once try to take a look out of the window maybe they can see him. On one day they managed to finally take a look at the always drunk guy and he was a gray-haired, fat dude in an orange overall, which means that he works for the garbage removal. Those dudes also clean up the streets, so maybe he was nice enough to wipe away his own vomit! Mystery solved! He also walked by at our house on the very same day, so I was able to see him too.
My sister also wanted to visit my father's home-village in the Vojvodina, which is some where in Serbia. Awesome. But first we stayed for two days in Budapest, where we met Almos, my father's über-crazy friend and our awesome nanny Hajni. That was pretty nice, but Eli (Izabeth managed to get a sunburn.  
In Serbia we stayed at my uncle's father's house. Sounds complicated. The house was not very fancy. We had an almost broken water toilet. You can only use that toilet to pee, but if you need to take a nice shit, you have to use the outhouse. This outhouse was at the other end of the garden and had no lights. Only Leroy (ElaryWakefield) was brave enough to visit that toilet. Most of the time we used the toilet at our uncle's house. There you only couldn't lock the door to the toilet, but at least his outhouse has a light and door which you can lock! Woohoo. The fair was loud as usual and all children ran around with toy.weapons. Hehe. We only had a few blackouts and Leroy saw her first real gypsies there. I was almost forced to watch two masses! The first one was in the church, where my father used to be an altar boy (this chruch was in Crotia, but back then we all now this was one country). The second one wasn't part of the deal, so I left that horrible mass, after 20 minutes. That almost 1000 year old priest talked for ever! The old dudes (my grandmother's cousin and another family member who only could speak Croatian) wanted to beat him up! The first mass was held by a young priest, who's a friend of my uncle. He was pretty sweet and we all liked him. My uncle invited the whole family to tell them our family origins (which he made up...most of it together with me in November 2013). He had a cook there, who was pretty nice too. He made an awesome cake, but my uncle didn't want to give the cake to anybody. We still managed to get that cake! My uncle also drove to Subotica and bought himslef a Burek, but he didn't bring one for the others. Only I got a piece of his Burek, because I pointed that out. Evil uncle Titty. My uncle's other nephew and his girlfriend visited him too. That dude is some relative from his father's side. (My uncle is my father's cousin.) The priest made some jokes about that dude, because my fater, me and my sister all have a lot of hair and that nephew has not a single hair left on his head and he's allegdly 28. My sister claims that he's at least 38 or even older. He and his girlfriend (who doesn't have many hair too) have a small child, which they named Limetree-Wood. (The baby wasn't really cute or pretty...I don't know why he looked somehow urgs...I know that sounds mean.) How can you give your child such an stupid name? That poor child will have a horrible time at kindergarten and school. 
We also had to walk once in the pouring rain because we had no money for the bus and it was so cold and we only wore our leather jackets because my father claimed that it won't rain. He said some strange things about the birds flying and the clouds. When we came back and were really wet, he still claimed that it is not raining!  
My father also made fun of me, because I brushed and combed my hair in front of a really crappy mirror and wanted to make some pretty braids. He just looked at me and said that I'm suffering from the Old-Queens-Syndrome and that he's still 1000 times prettier than me. He also claimed that his horse-hair jacket was actually made of my hair. That's mean. 
On the last day in the morning when my sister was still dizzy, we were greeted by my uncle's naked white ass. He didn't close his bathroom door. Not hot. On that morning my sister also tripped over her suitcase and fell down in a beautiful way, which was better than everything you ever saw on Laurel and Hardy or the Three Stooges. 
At least the whole family-reunion-party was a mess and extremely unorganized! We hadn't enough dishes (my father tried to bring some from the other house, but he only found a rusty fork and a rusty knife) and we had unstable tents. My uncle just can't organize anything. Because we had no toilet by my standards and the mirrors were a mess too, I was really pissed and mad at my sister. But since she had to stay during the whole almost two hour long mass with the ancient priest, I decided that she made atonement for her sins.

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My to do list:
Autumn
Winter
Jeffrey Dahmer
Pink Sheep for ILoveBrucieD
Angel for MadKittyCat

My cat's facebook account: Alma MacMeow 


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